Starting My Commitment to Change

Even though I won't be having my surgery for a number of months, I have started a few changes.  I intend to gradually change some of my behaviors to make things slightly easier for me once I have weight loss surgery.  I think if I wait to make any changes it will just make it that much harder to deal with such a huge change in my life.

1.  Water
I have switched to drinking water almost exclusively.  I will freely admit that I do drink a coke every once in a while when we are out for dinner.  At home I drink water exclusively.  I've also been getting in a whole lot of water.  I have a Hydro Flask that I keep filled all the time.  I find that I honestly don't miss soft drinks that much.  I'm also finding that when I do get coke somewhere, I don't always finish it.  One recommendation I've read about prepping for the surgery is to stop drinking carbonated drinks and caffeine two months before the surgery.  I have a head start on this and so I think this will be easier for me to give up.

2.  Walking/Swimming
I have started to walk a couple of times per week.  I know it doesn't sound like much.  I find that I have a tendency to overdo it and then get injured or have my knees achy and swollen.  So I'm taking it slow when I'm in pain.  I also have been getting in the pool and moving around nearly every day recently.  I don't swim laps yet, but I try to make sure I'm walking in the pool or moving around.  My goal will be to go walking consistently--even if it's only for 10 minutes.

3.  Eating at Home
I've been trying to eat at home a lot more often lately.  My job in the spring was incredibly stressful and exhausting.  I had more than a few 70-80 hour weeks.  I was just not going to cook.  So we ate out a lot.  Now that things have settled down at work, I have a lot more time to cook and get groceries.  I haven't really changed my portions or gone way out of my way to eat healthier.  But honestly I am eating healthier than I was.  I will reach for string cheese and pita chips rather than get fast food.  I do eat out and I do get fast food, but it's not constant like it has been in the past.  This will be an area I have to continue to work on.  This should also help my finances :)

4.  General Health
I'm also trying to take this opportunity to start taking better care of myself in general.  I saw my OB/GYN and had my first mammogram!  I went to the dentist for the first time in 22 years.  I actually take pretty good care of my teeth so I didn't have any cavities or issues.  I am going to schedule a deep under gums cleaning at some point.  I also bought a waterpik because I hate thread floss.  I'm going to have a sleep study done soon.  I'm also looking for a new counselor/therapist.  So I am trying to think about my well being and health in general.

I will keep you updated on my progress!

My Victory List

I’m not very good at complimenting myself.  I tend to be hard on myself and expect a lot of myself.  It’s hard for me to see all the good that I do and that I am.  I am trying though, and it’s slowly getting easier and better.

Journaling has helped tremendously.  It started very slowly.  I would sit there and agonize over anything genuine to write.  I didn’t want to just write something I didn’t believe.  But slowly I would find little things I could write and believe about myself that were positive and wonderful.  I began to see the little victories in my life.  I began to believe.  

I used to overlook the little victories.  I used to think the little victories were things like going for a 30 minute walk or drinking 64 ounces of water.  Yes, those are absolutely victories.  They are actually pretty big victories.  A single glass of water is a victory too!  A 5 minute walk is a victory!  I know it sounds silly, but these little things add up, especially when my life has seemed so devoid of joy for so long.  Being able to recognize these little victories has really made me feel good.  I’ve been able to slowly track these in my journal and genuinely celebrate them.

Here is a list of little victories:

"Happy Plate" - Leaving food on the plate!

ordering a smaller portion/appetizer instead of a full meal

drink a glass of water

clean/straighten a room

do a load of dishes/laundry

fold clothes

hang up clothes

scoop/change litter

mow lawn

walk

yoga

bike

physical therapy

eat at home

cook a meal

say no to eating out

say no to food

give away food

go grocery shopping

forgive myself

be kind to myself

do art

do a craft

run an errand

be productive for an hour at work

stand up for myself

This list is not exhaustive.  I add to it as I discover that something I’ve done is a victory.  Sometimes it’s an amazing feeling, and sometimes it just feels strange.  I threw away half an order of fries the other day.  I’m not used to throwing away food.  It didn’t make me feel sad or angry or guilty or even happy.  It was kind of just… a curious feeling.  I almost felt detached from it.  And I was glad I did it.  It was almost like there was no emotion attached to the fact that I was full and I didn’t care to eat any more french fries.  Go figure!

iPhone App Review: Momentum

Mindbloom has a lot of really interesting motivational apps.  I've been trying them all to some degree or another, and the one that really stands out for me is Momentum.  The idea behind Momentum, is that by recognizing the good moments in your life, they build up momentum to keep you moving forward.

Your hot air balloon flies along.  You click on your fuel gauge to add fuel:

You can show your fuel through taking a picture, adding a picture or writing a note.  For each piece of fuel, you select what kind of fuel it was--a Happy Moment, a Victory Moment, a Reflective Moment, a Kindness Moment, or a Thankful Moment.  You can play back through your momentum as well.  You earn tickets for your progress, and you can upgrade your balloon over time.

My balloon has a red streamer :)

You can also do little challenges for fuel by clicking on a box that flies by.  The challenge may ask you to do a full body stretch, drink a glass of water, or answer a question.

Momentum is a free app.  It's fairly simple and doesn't require much time or effort.  I like it as a reminder to me to celebrate my little victories.  I also like the reminder that I want to recognize the things that make me feel happy, victorious, reflective, kind, or thankful!